Turn Off The Dark
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“The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; those who dwelt in a land of deep darkness, on them has light shined.” Isaiah 9:2
As a child, I remember having to do chores on the farm sometimes when it was dark outside. I did not like going into the barn in the dark. It was not so much that I was afraid of the dark, but I was afraid of what creatures lurked in the dark. I remember turning on the lights in the sheep barn and having rats run in front of my feet. I always screamed at that sight. I remember having an outside light shining in the barnyard as security, and it always gave light to my bedroom. I had a huge nightlight illuminating the darkness.
I have been reading the book, Through the Eyes of a Lion by Levi Lusko. It is his journey through the impossible pain of the death of his five-year-old daughter, Lenya and finding incredible power and hope in Jesus. One of the chapters in his book is entitled, “Turn Off The Dark.” I have been pondering these words and the powerful description they give to grief. Darkness consumes us and envelopes us into this deep cavern of grief and despair. We feel the darkness of loneliness, fear, despair, and the loss of hope and meaning.
No matter how much light we put on the hole in our heart, the hole always remains. Nothing seems to change the dark hole of grief. Early in our grief, darkness consumes almost every moment. We feel the gut punch of the grief in the darkness. It is difficult to take a breath in between the intensity of the pain. We barely survive each moment and even wonder how we could ever live. All we see is darkness around us. Our foundation of life and faith tells us there is light, but we cannot see it and feel nothing in this dark pit of grief. We wonder what lurks in the dark.
As we crawl down the path our greatest desire is to turn off the dark. We are not ready to see the light and live in the light of each day. We just want the darkness not to be so intense. We are just trying to survive. We attempt to take some breaths without feeling the depth of the pain and hurt. The darkness almost becomes comfortable. It is what we know, and we feel if we come out of the darkness, we will lose our connection with death and our loved one. Our focus remains on how and why our loved one died. The darkness represents death, and that is where our mind and thoughts stay. We stay in the dying.
Then, we begin to walk the path of grief and as we move farther down the path, we notice a glimpse of light that flickers in the distance. The dark has less control. We are grieving but also living. We function in daily life and have moments where we experience good and have some peace. Life is different, and we begin to focus on how our loved one lived life not just how they died. They lived and brought light and life into our lives and the world. Oh, we have moments that darkness still consumes, but they are moments. We are learning to live more focused on the increasing light not the consuming darkness.
Who turns off the dark? I believe it is Jesus. He is the light of the world. (John 8:12) Through Jesus’ death on the cross, he conquered death. Death and darkness are no longer in control. Jesus brings light into the dark. He turns off the dark with his light. In our grief, we may know that Jesus is with us, but the dark consumes us for a time. It is having a hope of a hope that someday we see Jesus’ light and believe our loved one is in Heaven surrounded by the light and love of Jesus. Jesus shines His light of love and hope into our darkness of grief. He turns off the dark and guides us to focus on the love that never dies.
Here on earth, there will always be darkness, but Heaven is filled with light – the light of Jesus. In our grief, we work toward turning off the dark and allowing the light of Jesus to shine in the darkness of our pain and hurt. It is a process. We may turn off the dark and live in the numbness of existence for awhile before light begins to permeate the dark. Turn off the dark and allow the light to begin to come into your world of grief. Death and darkness is not in control. Heaven is full of light where Jesus and our loved ones dwell. They are surrounded with light and love. Our loved ones’ light still shines in our hearts. Take steps toward the light. The light of love that is in our hearts through our loved one and through Jesus. Turn off the dark and focus on the glimmers of light that are breaking through.
Turn off the dark!
