Where Are You Christmas?
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“The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; those who dwelt in a land of deep darkness on them has light shined.” Isaiah 9:3
Faith Hill sings the song “Where Are You Christmas?” in the movie soundtrack for The Grinch. The song begins –
“Where are you Christmas?
Why can’t I find you?
Why have you gone away?”
The song continues – “My world is changing, I’m rearranging. Does that mean Christmas changes too?” I have heard the statement several times recently – “I just don’t want to do Christmas this year.” In our society, “to do” Christmas means to do all the work of shopping, decorating, meal preparation, visits with family, cleaning, and all the events of the season. All this takes energy, planning, decision-making and enthusiasm. These expectations have been diminished in our grief. Grief clouds our thought process and just makes what seems like to others the simplest of decisions overwhelming to us.
This is not Christmas to me. It feels like Christmas has gone away. My Christmas Season is again different this year. I moved this past weekend into a condo and am focused on the updates needed to make it my home. I am taking a trip. I am ending an adventure and headed into this new chapter alone. My heart is not into the hustle and bustle of the Season. I have no desire “to do” the busyness of the holiday. Where are you Christmas? It feels like you have gone away.
This year I am fine with those outward expressions fading into the distance. I enjoy seeing the lights of other people’s decorations and to see the beauty of lighted trees. There is a tree outside my counseling office at Church which I have claimed as my tree. I turn on the lights each day I counsel. I placed my Precious Moments nativity scene on my new fireplace mantle with angels on each side. That’s my focus this year. Simple yet focused on the meaning of Christmas.
So, I have been pondering about not doing Christmas but just being Christmas this year. Christmas means the mass on Christ’s day. A religious mass is a time of worship which includes Holy Communion – the presence of Jesus’s body and blood in the elements of the bread and cup. So, to me, to be Christmas is to be present with Jesus. This year, I feel the peace of Jesus with me in the changes of my life. I have sadness for the loss of loved ones and not being with my special person, but I also have the peace of Jesus’ presence with me. I feel more relaxed as I simply focus on being present with Jesus.
Christmas is not the outward expressions that exhaust us. Christmas is within our hearts even in the sadness of our hearts. God comes to be with us in Jesus. God comes to be with us in our sadness and hurt. Christmas reminds us how much God loves us by coming to be with us in the darkness and bringing light and hope through Jesus.
So, this Christmas, I am giving myself permission to release the hustle and bustle and the shopping and decorations. I am going to be present with Jesus instead of buying presents. I am going to listen to Christmas music and worship quietly. I am going to allow myself moments of sadness and grief. I am going to relax and not give in to the pressures of the season. My gift to all of you is my presence whenever you need it, my prayers and support, and most of all, I hope that my words, my actions, and my presence expresses the peace and love of Jesus. Where are you Christmas? You are in my heart.
