Underbrush of Life
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“So we do not lose heart. Even though our outer nature is wasting away, our inner nature is being renewed day by day.” 2 Corinthians 4:16 RSV
My dog, Annie and I took a walk at a park recently. The tall trees were bare, and their leaves covered the forest floor. The underbrush was full of color and radiated in the sunlight. Because the leaves were gone on the trees, the sunlight could penetrate through them and shine on the plants below. The underbrush is what is beneath the huge trees and closest to the ground. It grows first in the Spring and is the last to lose its color in the Fall.
Life has underbrush in many ways. Sometimes we focus only on the outward appearance – what we can see – and do not look for the beauty and depth underneath. Sometimes we only focus on the busyness of life not on what is inside our hearts. We can miss the beauty of the situation or the person when we only have an outward focus, and when we are only looking for outward beauty.
As I thought about underbrush, the word underlying came to mind, too. Underlying is something implied though not directly expressed. It lies beneath and is not obvious, but it can be the cause of the issue or situation. Underlying is asking, “What is causing me to feel this way?” “Why am I angry, sad, afraid?” “Why is he acting like that or why is she crying?” When we have a stomachache, we ask ourselves, “What did I eat that may have upset it? Or am I worried and upset about something that is affecting my stomach?” This is how we interpret underlying in our daily lives. It is not something we immediately are aware of but can cause how we are feeling and experiencing life.
The underlying cause of sadness and anxiety may be the loss of the person who brought joy and security to life. You appear to function outwardly but inwardly hidden in the underbrush, you are overwhelmed and do not know how to take steps into this different life. You attempt living in the moment but underneath it may feel fake and empty. When I feel like something is different or I’m not quite myself, I begin to process what is going on inside myself. I search for what is bothering me, irritating me, what has changed, and what is the cause or root of these different feelings. It is admitting I feel this way because of this underlying issue or feeling. It is then talking myself through it with God.
As you think about your life and how you feel, there is something underlying that may be keeping you from finding peace and contentment in what you now have. You may name it anxiety or fear. But what is causing this anxiety and fear to flood your thoughts and feelings? Sometimes with fear it is not wanting to be alone and afraid this is how life will always be. It may be the loss of your safety and security. Life did not turn out like you had expected which is the cause of your negativity, fear, or anxiousness.
We tend to go too far out in planning and figuring out what will happen. The underlying cause of anxiety is focusing too far into the future and trying to fix and plan for every possible scenario. It is worrying about everything and believing if you worry about it, you can prevent the bad from happening. This is what is feeding the anxiety and fear. It is bringing yourself back to the present, looking around you, and finding fulfillment in these moments. We need to give God the future and try staying more in the present. It is acknowledging where these feelings come from and releasing their control over to God.
So is there anything under these feelings and thoughts?I believe there is.It is our faith and belief in God.God is always under us, holding us up and preventing us from sinking into hopelessness.It is trusting even when we are afraid, even when we do not feel or sense God’s presence.It is saying, “God you got this, and you got me.I am going to trust you.”
