Memories of Thanksgiving

“O give thanks to the Lord, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever.” Psalm 136:1

I had dinner last week with my siblings.  I am thankful that each month we share a meal, and we enjoy being together.  We share our experiences and memories of the past.  I know I am blessed to have siblings, to get along with them, and to want to be connected as a family.  I began to reflect on each one of them and how alike and how different we are.  We share the strong foundation of our Christian faith, the love of family and traditions, our work ethic, and the love of the land.  My two oldest brothers enjoy farming, tractors, and have the ability to fix and build.  My sister has the gift to sew and quilt and is very talented.  My other brother has the gift of gardening and growing the best salad mix!  My siblings have many other gifts, but today I give thanks for these gifts.

As I shared with a grief support group in my hometown, I gave thanks for the memories of living there and the people who were part of my life.  My cousin was at the group, and I was thankful for her family and the memories I have growing up.  While I miss their love and presence, I have moved my focus from missing them to being thankful for the wonderful memories I have of them.  I give thanks for their lives and influence.

When someone comes to my mind, I am learning to thank God for their life.  If they are in Heaven, I pause to say a prayer of thanksgiving and try to remember something special about them.  For instance, I remember Charles and Frances from Cincinnati who always smiled while I preached.  They invited me to dinner and held a special place in my heart.  I remember Marie who was my neighbor in Celina and how she was learning to play the piano in her eighties.  I remember Ruth who adopted me as her granddaughter and was my support in my grief.  I give thanks to God for each of them who are now in Heaven.  When I am thankful for people in my life, I try to send a note or text to let them know I am thankful for their friendship and love.

We miss our loved ones and live in the sadness that we are no longer sharing life with them.  We have memories of their lives and love and the difference they made in our lives.  I believe over time we move from this sadness of existing in the loneliness and hurt and darkness, and we begin living in the memories.  I think this transition occurs by being thankful.  When we turn from the negativity and begin being grateful for the privilege of having our loved one in our life and the opportunity to love, learn, and grow because of them, we start living our lives more fully and seeing the good.  Some people have a more negative slant on life but desire to be more positive.  To change a perspective on life occurs through the process of being thankful.

I am thankful for the cloud of witnesses that are around me.  That is, for the people I have loved and are now in Heaven.  I miss them but I am more focused now on being thankful they were in my life, and I treasure the memories.  I am focusing more on the difference they made in my life and what I learned from them.  I give thanks to God for the privilege of having them in my life.

As November begins, I challenge each of you to focus on being thankful.  No matter how you feel, where you are in your grief or your circumstances in life, there is always something you can give thanks.  Let us write down each day in November three things you give God thanks.  You can start with being thankful for breathing, the blue sky, and the ability to read these words.  Hey, I just got you started with your November Thanks List!  Focus on being thankful.