Thankful Holes

“O give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; for His steadfast love endures forever.” Psalm 106:1

Thanksgiving – a time to give thanks.  We thank God for His love, His Presence, the gift of salvation through Jesus, and the gift of life.  We give thanks for family and friends.  We give thanks for food, shelter, and personal needs. We give thanks for the good of life, but can we truly give thanks in all circumstances of life?

As I reflect on Thanksgiving, I give thanks for all the people God has placed on my path of life.  Family, friends, church family, co-workers, patients, and clients who have influenced and given meaning to my days.  I walked the journey with some people for a short time and others continue to be with me.  I am who I am because of the faith and influence of others.  Sometimes I learned by positive example and other times I learned through the hurt and heartache. 

I give thanks for my loved ones who are now in Heaven.  Their lives made an impact and imprint on my life and influenced my faith and direction in life.  I am thankful they lived, and that God placed them on my path of life.  But with the gratitude also comes the grief and sorrow that they are not physically with me.  The hole in my heart is intense because they are not here walking with me.  Grief is the price of love.  I am thankful that I have loved and therefore, thankful for the pain and grief.  I cannot imagine not having my loved ones in my life.  I would not be this far down the path of life if they had not been in my life.

This past week, I celebrated the 100th birthday of my friend, Frank.  Unfortunately, with COVID, the family could not have a big celebration.  I sat with Frank and we talked about his life – his career, his military service, his wife and family, our faith and Heaven.  I am thankful for Frank’s life, his service to our country, his faith and his deep love for his wife and family.  I had a special friendship with Frank’s sister-in-law, Ruth, and then his wife, Nancy, and because of the hole in our hearts, we have bonded as friends. I miss Ruth and Nancy and have a hole in my heart because they are now in Heaven.  I am thankful they are in Heaven because the loss of them developed my friendship with Frank.

I also led a couple of grief groups this past week.  As I shared my story of grief and loss and survival, I was thankful for my grief.  Not that I wanted my loved ones to die, but because of their death, I could relate and help others who were beginning the journey of grief.  I recognized the holes in their hearts.  As one person said, “It is good to be with others who get it.”  None of us want to grieve but we are all walking the grief path because we have loved deeply and would do it all over again.  The pain and loss is overwhelming at times, but it would be worse not to have loved and had our loved ones in our lives.

This year Thanksgiving is different in so many ways.  Because of our grief and because of COVID.  We may not be able to celebrate with our extended family and our loved one will not be here.  Maybe this year, we can focus on moments – moments that we remember the love God has for us.  Moments we celebrate our loved one’s legacy.  Moments we talk with people who continue to influence our lives and walk the path of life with us.  Moments we give thanks.  Moments of grief and sadness.  Moments we recognize and give thanks for the holes in our hearts. Moments of joy and celebration.  Moments.