Disappointed But Not Discouraged

“Have I not commanded you?  Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”  Joshua 1:9

I spent each night visiting my friend in the hospital this past week.  After determining what was going on, she wanted to go home and recover in her own comfortable environment.  The doctors determined it was best for her to go to rehab first and have physical therapy.  She was disappointed, but she accepted the decision.  She was not discouraged because she was determined to get stronger and go home and prove to the doctors, she could do it.

Life disappoints.  People disappoint.  They do not meet our expectations.  They do not always follow through and do what we had hoped or even what they promised to do.  Someone may have promised to always be there for you but when you need them, they are nowhere to be found.  You may be disappointed that they do not support you now even though they have been your friend for a long time.

What do you do with your disappointments?  First, we need to define disappointment.  It is a sadness or displeasure caused by the nonfulfillment of one’s hopes or expectations.  Sometimes our disappointment is directed toward a person, sometimes a situation, and sometimes toward ourselves.  First, it is bringing these feelings to God.  Talk to God about how you feel, not to other people.  Release the sadness and irritation.  Do not absorb the failure of others to meet your expectations.  They may not have known what you expected.  Other people have different views of the situation than you do.

When we are disappointed in how we reacted, what we failed to do or what we actually did, it is recognizing we all mess up from time to time.  We are not perfect.  It is forgiving ourselves and releasing the sadness to God.   When we dwell on the disappointments, it can turn to bitterness and resentment.  It festers inside of us and prevents us from moving forward.  We just ruminate on the hurt, and it begins to permeate into all areas of life.  We quit connecting with others because we fear they will just disappoint us.  This can lead to discouragement.

Discouragement is the loss of confidence or enthusiasm for something.  At first my friend, when she heard she had to go to rehab was fearful she would never get out and be able to go home.  But through conversations and prayer, she became determined to prove she could get stronger and go home.  She had the courage to move forward.

I have experienced disappointment.  I expected others to be supportive of my endeavor.  I hoped they would be as excited about it as me.  When it did not happen, I was upset, angry, and at first wondered why I even bothered.  The thoughts in my head were negative and began to convince me to give up.  But through prayer and listening to God and not giving other people control, I did not become discouraged.  In fact, I used the disappointment and turned it into courage to try something new and different.

Courage is the strength in the face of pain or something frightening.  It is facing a fear.  Courage is deep within us.  It comes from our trust and faith in God.  God can use our disappointments as training ground to grow and depend on Him and not the views of other people.

When we live in the expectations of others, they are in control. We will sway back and forth based on their whim and fickleness.  Have the courage to face your disappointments and not let them defeat you or control you.  Allow God to use them as a challenge to trust that God has a plan – one you cannot see yet.  Don’t be discouraged.  God is with you wherever you go.

 

Here’s the Amazon link to my new book – Live Different Moments -

Live Different Moments: Finding Contentment and Peace after Change and Loss: Sturtz, Elaine J. Clinger: 9798989125708: Amazon.com: Books