Gnawings of Life
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“He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.” Psalm 147:3
My dog, Annie, has a sore paw. After one of our long walks, she began licking her right front paw and made it red and sore. She would not stop licking and chewing on it, and it made her sick. She vomited one early morning for several hours because of it. I had to wrap her paw to keep her from gnawing on it and making it worse. She could not stop. She now has a little pink boot on her paw. I clean and soak it each evening. She is obsessed with the paw and as soon as I unwrap it, she tries to lick and chew on it. She does not realize what is good for her – that healing can only happen if she stops gnawing on the sore paw. I want to help her heal, but she does not like what I need to do to bring the healing.
The similarities to life and Annie’s paw struck me as I talked with someone in the depth of grief again. Life happens unexpectedly as we are just trying to walk the normal everyday path of life. We experience the intensity of pain and hurt. We are doing well and then cannot believe that life just blows up around us. Our first reaction is to try to fix everything on our own. That is, to lick our paw and smooth out life and heal everything ourselves.
Sometimes we cover up our struggles in life and our grief by keeping busy and ignoring it. We stuff it down inside with the hope if we do not acknowledge it, we cannot be hurt by it, and it will disappear. We may feel the pain and grief, but we try to avoid feeling and facing reality, so we escape or turn inward and attempt to focus elsewhere.
But like my dog’s paw, the gnawing inside does not go away – the worries, the troubles, the anxiety, the grief - remains even when we cover it up. We feel it, and it gnaws at every fiber of our being. We feel the emptiness, the pain, and our desire is for it all to be healed and for life to be calm and peaceful even for a moment.
We attempt to figure out life on our own. We tell ourselves, “I can fix this.” “I can make life better. I just need to work harder.” But the more we try on our own, the more exhausted, lonely, and abandoned we feel. We take on the responsibility that is not ours to do. I believe, my dog, Annie, tells herself, “Just let me gnaw on my paw and I can heal it myself.” It does not work for Annie, nor does it work for our lives. Annie needs medication, healing time, and my assistance and expert medical care to heal her paw. She also needs to release it and not do it herself. We too, need rest, quiet time, and God. Like Anne who does not like me messing with her paw and trying to help her heal, we do not turn to the One who can walk with us in each moment and give us peace and His Presence.
While we believe and know God is with us, we attempt to walk the journey of life alone especially in the struggles and sorrows of life. God is the only one who can heal the gnawings of our lives and bandage our wounds. We do not always like how God walks us through the rough times because we would prefer God just take us out of them and miraculously heal the brokenness.
So what are you gnawing on? Are you gnawing on the past and living in the pain and regret? Are you worried about the future and living in the fear and anxiety? Are you gnawing at trying to heal yourself and your situation? God is the great healer. He promises to bandage our wounds. God will give us comfort in our sorrow and troubles. He will not take us out of them but through them if we will surrender to His leading and healing. Start gnawing on God’s Word and His promises.
