Tribute to My Mom
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“If you go the wrong way – to the right or to the left – you will hear a voice behind you saying, “This is the right way. You should go this way.” Isaiah 30:21
I grew up on a farm as the youngest of five children. My parents were hard working with strong morals and values and deep Christian faith. My mom was my first Sunday School teacher and then taught me again when I was in Jr. High. I witnessed my parents share daily in devotions together and my mom studying her Bible. We prayed at every meal, listened to Christian records and attended Gospel Concerts on a regular basis. Attending worship was a natural part of every Sunday.
While my Grandma Clinger influenced my life, prayed for me daily, and guided me in God’s calling on my life, I have come to the realization the deep impact and imprint my mom has made on my life and my Christian faith. I continue to learn from her daily even though today, October 14th, is the Anniversary of her death and going to heaven thirteen years ago – October 14, 2006.
I remember the details of that day vividly, watching her take the journey to heaven. We gathered as a family in her room in the Nursing facility sharing stories and memories, laughing and crying together. Our mom gave us life and was the glue that held our family together, and we were feeling the turmoil of letting go and wanting to hold on at the same time.
The eight Sundays prior to my mom’s passing, my husband, Dave and I spent the day with my mom in this nursing facility. Her breast cancer had returned in her bones and treatment was no longer effective. My mom was positive and remained strong in her faith during this time ministering to each person who walked through her door. In these Sunday moments, my mom and I worshipped, prayed, shared scriptures, and deep conversation. I would push her in the wheelchair outside in God’s creation and the holy moments in nature warmed my heart and drew me closer to our Heavenly Father through my mom’s spirit.
One of the last Scriptures we shared together and discussed was Isaiah 30:21. In my Bible, I have the word “mom” written beside this verse. I believe this verse was a gift from God and the way my mom continues to be a guide and influence in my life. When I am at a crossroad in my life and wonder which way to go, I think of my mom and ask God to direct my path. I have this foundation of faith because of my mom.
As I said, I am the youngest of five children. Our mom loved each of us deeply but differently. My oldest brother, Edwin, was the first child who gave her life purpose and meaning as a mom and the title. This bond was pure and strong lasting a lifetime. The second child, my brother, David, became the son who had the natural ability of farming and who later in life moved onto the farm becoming the one who was next door to help my parents and then support my mom after my dad died. The third child, my sister, Carolyn, the first girl, gave my mom a daughter to share her love for sewing and creating. The fourth child, my brother, Bruce, was raised in the garden and came to love the garden like my mom. Then I was born. I was “daddy’s little girl” who was always “volunteered” by my siblings to go with my dad because he never wanted to do anything alone.
As my siblings grew and became adults and started their own lives away from the farm, my mom and I spent more time together. She encouraged me to pursue my dream of college. I came to understand, I was also living the dream my mom had for herself. She never had the opportunity to further her education and therefore, was excited to follow each step of where God was calling me in my life.
Through my ministry, my parents visited me wherever I served. My mom and I shared the Walk to Emmaus – a spiritual renewal weekend – together with me as her Spiritual Director. My mom has always been and will continue to be my spiritual director. In countless conversations whether in person or on the phone, we discussed Scriptures, spiritual ideas and God’s direction and calling on my life. My mom was a prayer warrior and a Bible scholar. In any Bible study she participated, pastors and leaders would defer to her for understanding of Scriptures.
I miss my mom every day. I still have the urge to call her and ask how to do something. She was Google before Google was invented. When God gives me a Scripture insight, I want to call and share it with her. I talk with her each day and know she is still with me in my heart.
Today, I remember with love my mom. I am sad she is not physically present with me, but she remains in my heart forever. I grieve her loss, but celebrate that she lived. I am thankful for her life, her impact and imprint on my life.
Anniversary dates are a time to reflect and remember. We may cry because our loved one is not present, but we rejoice that they lived and made a difference in our lives. I am a better person because my mom lived and was my mom. I give thanks for her life.
